| Rank | Team | Record | Win % |
|---|---|---|---|
| 1 | Ohio State | 2-1 | 66.7% |
| 2 | Texas | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 3 | Georgia | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 4 | Notre Dame | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 5 | Oregon | 2-1 | 66.7% |
| 6 | Indiana | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 7 | Miami | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 8 | Alabama | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 9 | Penn State | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 10 | LSU | 2-1 | 66.7% |
| 11 | Ole Miss | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 12 | Tennessee | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 13 | Texas A&M | 2-1 | 66.7% |
| 14 | Texas Tech | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 15 | Oklahoma | 2-1 | 66.7% |
| 16 | USC | 4-0 | 100.0% |
| 17 | Michigan | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 18 | Florida | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 19 | Utah | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 20 | BYU | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 21 | Iowa | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 22 | Missouri | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 23 | Louisville | 2-1 | 66.7% |
| 24 | Nebraska | 3-0 | 100.0% |
| 25 | Mississippi State | 3-0 | 100.0% |
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The article appearing above is a work of absolute fiction, satire, and
whimsical fabrication. Any names, characters, teams, coaching
blunders, or miraculous trick plays mentioned are entirely products of
the author's overactive imagination or are used fictitiously.
Any resemblance to actual sports franchises, living athletes, deceased
legends, or fans crying in the stadium parking lot is purely
coincidental. No real-world statistics were harmed in the making of
this narrative, though several laws of physics may have been brought
into question. Please consume responsibly and do not cite this page in
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